Beginning to Workout...How I Got Addicted

So here's the quick story of my life (well, part of it).  Growing up, I was the chubby kid.  I hated sports and loved sweets.  I never really cared too much when I was a kid, but once I hit middle school, my weight really started to get to me.  I began to hate how I looked.  I started to wear baggy clothes to hide the fat, and I rarely removed my shirt in public (even when going to swimming pools...I would swim in a tee shirt).  I hit high school and was still overweight.  I was depressed about how I looked and decided to take action.  I started eating appropriately-sized meals, cut out most sweets, and ran on the treadmill (I could barely make it through a 5 minute jog when I started).  After about a year, I dropped twenty pounds (from 220 to 200).  The following year, I dropped another 30 (down to 170).  My weight was down to normal, but I was still dissatisfied with myself.  I didn't have a healthy-looking physique.  I had skinny arms, skinny legs, and a skinny neck...and I still had my love handles from before.  At that point, however, I didn't want to lose weight; I wanted to gain muscle...and I wanted to do it before leaving for my first year at college that fall.  I couldn't afford a bench and a barbell, and I felt too embarrassed to go to the gym, so I began with water jugs (yup...that is completely true).  I found an article on bodybuilding.com detailing a "water jug workout."  I was too naive to realize this was a workout geared toward those who wanted to squeeze in quick workout when traveling...but I didn't care.  I had it in my head that I was GOING to get buff!  After a month of "lifting," I of course had no results and gave up.  Shortly after, I headed to Chicago to begin my undergrad journey at Elmhurst College.  During my campus tour, we walked through the fitness center, and the first thought through my head was, 'There's no way in Hell I'll ever set foot in here.'  I moved into Niebuhr Hall and shortly realized that my floor consisted mostly of athletes (football, soccer, track, cross country).  My RA played soccer in high school and asked if I wanted to head over to the gym with him for a quick workout.  I hesitated but decided to go after two of my friends took him up on the offer.  I had no idea what I was doing once I got there but luckily, neither did my friends.  We followed Travis's every move and tried our best at each and every machine (at that time, the gym was separated into free weights on the main floor and machines on the upper floor).  We continued this for another couple of visits, and I soon became comfortable with the gym setting.  I began to look up workouts on bodybuilding.com, and tried my best to put on some mass.  I never used free weights, because the football players were always there (again...embarrassed).  I started buying whey, and I finally showed a little improvement.  Nothing extreme, but I at least looked normal for my height.  After about three years, I put on ten or fifteen pounds.  Again, I became frustrated...I should have put on so much more mass than 10 pounds!  But this time I didn't quit.  During my junior year, Snap Fitness came to my hometown.  I got myself a membership for the summer break.  I decided to do more research as to how I could increase my gains (and no...steroids were NOT an option!).  I quickly learned that I wasn't eating nearly enough.  Not enough protein, not enough carbs...I increased my caloric intake (from around 2000 to 3600) and worked HARD (I finally started to use free weights).  I put more mass on during that summer than I did during my previous three years at school.  It felt GREAT.  People started asking if I had been working out...they started saying that I looked good.  For the first time in my life, I started feeling confident about how I looked.  After that summer, I thought to myself that I could work harder, eat more, and gain more.  I ended up eating more and working the same (if not less).  I quickly gained back some fat.  It wasn't an extreme weight gain by any means, but I could feel it around my waist, and I could see it in my face.  I bought myself some low-fat cookbooks and began a diet...which lasted approximately 3 weeks.  The food was bland, and it took FOREVER to make...not a good combination.  I didn't lose any weight, and I went back to my regular eating habits.  Luckily, I didn't gain any more weight (at that point, I had incorporated HIIT into my workouts...which definitely helped keep me from gaining more fat).  This past spring (2011), I stumbled on a website that outlined a diet and workout to guarantee a 6 pack (yes, I know...it sounds like one of those "too good to be true" ad campaigns).  I was desperate.  I downloaded the plan and started it that evening.  What was it?  A cyclic ketogenic diet (CKD) coupled with a 6-day split workout (no cardio).  I researched the diet and found that it's common among bodybuilders to keep them from gaining fat.  It's basically the Atkin's diet for the first 6 days of the week with a 'carb day' on the last (I'll probably blog more about it later).  I quickly lost weight without losing too much muscle.  I went from 214 to 188 in a matter of a couple of months.  I didn't get the six pack I wanted, but that was fine by me.  I moved to Madison, WI for pharmacy school, threw out the diet, and switched to eating healthy foods.  I continued that same workout and quickly experienced the side effects of overworking my body.  I felt tired, I had headaches, and I was constantly sore.  Again I switched workouts.  I began to incorporate compound exercises (finally!) and forced myself to workout only once every other day.  My energy returned, and my headaches faded away.  I'm back on the CKD (with a few minor tweaks) and am slowly losing weight.  I'm not the biggest fan of this diet, so as soon as I hit my goal, I'm going back to eating whole grains, veggies, and fruit.  I have an extremely compulsive personality, so it's been quite easy to get me addicted to working out and dieting...which has not been the best thing in the world...I often have to force myself to take a break every once and a while.  I have strained more than one muscle thanks to over training...and have continued to work out, even with the strain.  Pharmacy school has definitely helped with that; I have less time to work out, and am forced to stay at home at least every other night.  Don't get me wrong...working out has definitely increased my health; my pulse is lower, as is my blood pressure, and I feel exponentially better than I did when I started.  It has been a crazy, bumpy road, but I'm FINALLY figuring out what to do to maximize the benefits.  I no longer pay attention to articles on bodybuilding.com that focus on isolating one specific group.  I no longer neglect my cardio, and I no longer compare myself to others.  I now have realistic, manageable goals, a healthy outlook on my body, and a wonderful sense of content.  I'm finally happy and healthy, and I can't wait for what's coming in the future!